FAMILY FOUNDATIONS
FINDING THE RIGHT ONE
The ultimate goal of dating or courting is finding a husband or wife for marriage and spending the rest of your life together.
BIBLICAL MARRIAGE
18Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” 19So the Lord God formed from the ground all the wild animals and all the birds of the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would call them, and the man chose a name for each one. 20He gave names to all the livestock, all the birds of the sky, and all the wild animals. But still there was no helper just right for him.
21So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep. While the man slept, the Lord God took out one of the man’s ribs and closed up the opening. 22Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man.
23“At last!” the man exclaimed. This one is bone from my bone, and flesh! She will be called ‘woman,’ because she was taken from ‘man.’” 24This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one. Genesis 2:18-24 NLT
There is a big difference between a date for two single people and a date for a married couple. One is seeking the right person so the two can build a life together and the other is strengthening a foundation that has already been established.
WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY ABOUT DATING?
Although the words “courtship” and “dating” are not found in the Bible, we are given some principles that Christians are to follow during the time before marriage. It is important to remember that neither dating nor courtship is mandated in Scripture.
1And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice – the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. 2Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect. Romans 12:1-2 NLT
THE WORLD’S PATTERN OF DATING DOESN’T TRAIN YOUNG PEOPLE FOR MARRIAGE; IT PREPARES THEM FOR DIVORCE.
1Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits in the place of honor at God’s right hand. 2Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth. 3 For you died to this life, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God. Colossians 3:1-3 NLT
WHAT MAKES FOR A GREAT BIBLICAL DATE?
- Preparing well in advance.
- Dying to selfishness.
- Communicating about each person’s expectations.
- Establishing healthy boundaries.
- Planning your time well.
- Honoring God and each other.
- Having fun without guilt.
- Honoring the people you love.
- Going on group dates with like-minded friends.
- Having the same faith.
14 Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? 15 What harmony can there be between Christ and the devil? How can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever? 2 Corinthians 6:14-15 NLT
SEEK THE KINGDOM OF GOD ABOVE ALL ELSE!
31 “So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ 32These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. 33Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.” Matthew 6:31-33 NLT
Next Steps for me today…
- Memorize Romans 12:1-2.
- Establish healthy boundaries in all relationships.
- Surround yourself with friends who listen to Jesus and obey.